


But She's Only A Dream

by Femme_Fatale_0335



Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Badass Mai (Avatar), Bisexual Sokka (Avatar), Bisexual Suki (Avatar), F/F, Film Noir, Gay Zuko (Avatar), Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Lesbian Mai (Avatar), Lesbian Ty Lee (Avatar), Mai (Avatar)-Centric, Minor Character Death, but its in our world so, except its not modern coz its set in the 40s, replenish the Mailee tag on AO3 2020
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-15
Updated: 2020-08-15
Packaged: 2021-03-06 03:14:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,464
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25916437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Femme_Fatale_0335/pseuds/Femme_Fatale_0335
Summary: Mai thinks she's built the life she wants for herself. It's been years since she's seen her family, or any of the high-society types she grew up around. She's left that world behind, and has no intention of going back. But when Azula needs help proving she didn't poison her father, Mai reluctantly returns to the neighbourhood she was raised in.or, mailee film noir au bc mai kinda reminds me of a noir protagonist.
Relationships: Mai & Sokka (Avatar), Mai & Suki (Avatar), Mai & Zuko (Avatar), Mai/Ty Lee (Avatar), Sokka/Suki (Avatar)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 20





	1. Footsteps That You Hear Down The Hall

**Author's Note:**

> So it's basically a film noir AU where Mai is a detective! Mild content warnings for guns, mentions of death and brief allusions to abuse. The titles (the work itself and the chapters) all come from Johnny Mercer's lyrics to the main theme from Otto Preminger's "Laura" (1944), an enduring film noir classic. Here's Ella Fitzgerald's version of the song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZObeGXsjqmU . Enjoy!

Mai’s office was on the top floor of a dingy building downtown. The wallpaper was peeling, the elevator was out of order half the time, and the hallways smelled of mildew and ancient cigarette smoke. The view from her office window was of a dismal back alley. The office itself was boiling hot in the summer and horribly drafty in the winter. Every time it rained she discovered a new leak in the roof. The floorboards were squeaky and the neighbours were noisy and closing the window did nothing to shut out the clamour of the nearby busy street. The building was decrepit and the landlord didn’t seem to care about maintaining it. There was really nothing to say in defense of the building, except maybe that it had walls and a roof, but even that wasn’t entirely true. In short, the place was a dump – and Mai wouldn’t have it any other way. The rent was cheap and the other tenants didn’t bother her. Besides, when your office was threatening to collapse in on itself at any moment, it ensured that your only clients were the ones who really needed your help – not some rich shithead who thought his wife was cheating on him, or some spoiled brat who wanted to prove she hadn’t had a hand in her father’s death. At least, that was true until Azula floated into her office in a cloud of expensive perfume one sweltering July afternoon.

Azula was magnetically beautiful – there was no getting around it. She had sleek dark hair and piercing brown eyes and cheekbones sharp enough to cut through steel. But there was something cold and a little off-putting in her face and her demeanor. She was smiling, but it was a sardonic, almost cruel smile. Her eyes sparkled, but it was a cold glimmer, like icicles in the harsh winter sun. She was wearing an impeccably tailored black skirt suit, spotless white gloves and a pillbox hat with a black lace veil – mourning clothes, Mai figured. It was the click of her patent-leather heels on the floor that first alerted Mai to her presence. 

Mai had her feet up on her desk. Her secretary, Sokka, poked his head into the office and shrugged his shoulders at Mai. “I couldn’t stop her,” he whispered, “sorry.” Mai rolled her eyes and waved him out of the room. She ought to fire that idiot, she thought. “Secretary” really wasn’t the right title for him. He never took notes or did any filing. He really only had one job, and that was to make sure Mai didn’t have to deal with people like Azula. And what good was he if he couldn’t even do that? But then, she didn’t think she could bring herself to fire him. They were friends, after a fashion, and if nothing else, he made her laugh.

Azula held out her gloved hand for Mai to shake. Mai slid her legs down to the ground and stood up. She shook Azula’s hand (Azula’s grip was remarkably strong, she noticed) and pointed to a chair. “Won’t you sit down?” Azula sat down and crossed her long legs daintily at the ankle. Mai took a pen and notebook out of her desk drawer. She didn’t intend to take notes (if she wanted records she would make Sokka take the notes – that was supposed to be his job, after all), but one thing she had learned in her years as a private detective was that it was best to make the client think she cared about what they were saying. It upset them when they thought you weren’t paying attention. And Azula didn’t seem like the type of person whose bad side you would want to be on. “So,” Mai began, “what brings you here?”   
“Well, my father, he – he died.” Azula took a lace-trimmed handkerchief – monogrammed, of course – out of her leather purse and wiped her eyes. Mai hadn’t noticed any tears. Typical rich bitch, Mai thought. Azula must think if she pretended she had been crying Mai would take pity on her. Azula probably didn’t realize that Mai had known her share of rich bitches – Hell, she’d even dated a few. Some might say she used to be one. This was nothing new to her. “Sorry about that,” Mai said, trying to sound as if she gave a damn, “what can I do for you?”  
“Well, you see, he was poisoned. And the police won’t tell me anything! I’m afraid they think my brother and I were involved. I want you to help me clear my name.”   
“Mm. and how do you expect me to do that?” Azula looked incensed.  
“What do you mean, how?” she shouted, her previously measured voice becoming shrill as it rose, “You’re a detective, aren’t you? Isn’t this your job? Christ, if I knew how I’d do it myself instead of wasting my time coming to this dump!” Mai glanced towards the door. Sokka had left it slightly ajar – she knew had done it on purpose and was listening to what was going on. Azula picked up her handkerchief again and brought it to her eyes. “It’s just –” she began, doing her best to sound heartbroken, “Now that father’s gone Zuko and I only have each other, and we can’t be separated. I can’t go to jail, Mai. I won’t make it, I just know I won’t. You have to help me.” At this point Azula really was sobbing – Mai had to hand it to her, whatever else could be said about Azula, she could act. “I understand that, I really do.” Mai didn’t understand. She still thought Azula was lying, but telling her that would only make matters worse. “That’s not the problem here. If the cops won’t tell you anything, they sure as hell won’t tell me. And I can’t promise they’ll allow me near the crime scene either.” Azula looked upset. Her lower lip quivered and her eyes began to fill with tears. “Please,” she said, “just try. You’re my only hope.”   
“All right. Fine. I’ll see what I can do.” It wasn’t because Mai believed Azula’s sob story. If anything she was even more convinced that her client was hiding something. But something in Azula’s expression when Mai had expressed doubts about helping her had made Mai feel like she wouldn’t take no for an answer. 

Mai wasn’t afraid of a lot of things. She had stared down the barrel of a gun more times than she could count. An ex-girlfriend had once tried to run her over with a sports car. She had faced any number of desperate criminals in her day. But she was afraid of Azula. She wasn’t quite sure why. There was just something in that girl’s eyes that told you she was ruthless. And Mai was around seventy per cent sure she had seen a pistol in Azula’s bag when she had opened it to take out her card and give it to Mai. 

Mai picked up the card and turned it over in her hands. The address on it was in the most upscale neighbourhood in town. Mai knew that because she had grown up there. She hated to think about her life before. Her overbearing mother and volatile father. The debutante balls and the unbearably dull dinner parties. The long years of finishing school and all her friends getting engaged to boys their parents approved of and getting married and being model hostesses and having babies and forgetting all about Mai. She remembered the pain she had felt when her parents kicked her out after discovering her romance with a girl she had gone to school with. She didn’t care anymore, though. Now she wore men’s suits and carried a knife with her wherever she went and dated nightclub singers, librarians, showgirls, schoolteachers and even the heiresses she had grown up around and laughed in the face of authority and did whatever the hell she wanted. She wondered if anyone would see her visiting Azula and tell her family. Wouldn’t that be funny. 

There was a knock on the door. “Come in,” she said. Sokka edged cautiously into the room. “Oh, it’s just you,” Mai said, “what do you want?”   
“Did I hear you right?” he asked excitedly, “did you really say you’d help her?” Mai sighed.  
“How many times do I have to tell you? I don’t pay you to eavesdrop.”  
“No, I do that for free.” Mai couldn’t help but laugh. This was why she kept him around.  
“Yeah, I said I’d help her. Don’t know why I did, but there’s no going back now.”  
“Can I come with you?” Sokka pleaded. “I wanna see where you grew up.” Mai rolled her eyes. “Why the hell would you want to see that? It’s the most boring place on earth.”  
“Please?”  
“Fine. I guess I’d better bring you along anyway. I’m not sure I’d want to be alone with Azula. There’s something off about her. And if her brother is anything like her…” Sokka grinned and hugged Mai. “All right, all right,” she said, jabbing him in the chest with her elbow so he’d let go of her, “it’s not gonna be fun, you know. And if you do anything – anything – to get on Azula’s bad side… well, I guess you won’t have to worry about what she might do, because I’ll already have murdered you.” Sokka was still smiling. “All right, now get out of here before I change my mind and bring your sister instead,” Mai said and pointed to the door. He got up and left. Mai smiled to herself. She’d never tell him, of course, but Sokka was the best friend she had ever had. 

Azula had said that she expected Mai to be at her front door at eleven o’clock sharp the next morning, so Mai picked up Sokka at his apartment at ten thirty and told him to call a cab. In the car, she tried to give him a crash course in high society. “Don’t slouch. Don’t put your hands in your pockets. Goddamn it, don’t you own any ties that aren’t bow ties? We’re trying to look classy here.”   
“Yeah, I can see that. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you wear a skirt before.” Mai felt ridiculous. She had taken her only skirt suit out of the closet and borrowed a hat from Sokka’s sister. The hat was a little too small and it made her head ache, and the suit smelled of mothballs. It had been years since she had worn nylons, and now she remembered why she had stopped. There were few things she found more uncomfortable, unless it was the ridiculous shoes she was wearing. “I’m serious about the bow tie, though. It makes you look like a teenager. No one’s gonna take you seriously.”  
“Hey. People take me seriously all the time.”  
“Sure, keep telling yourself that.” 

When the taxi pulled up in front of Azula’s home, Mai noticed that all the houses nearby were even more imposing than she remembered. She couldn’t believe she had once called this neighbourhood home. But there had been a time when she had lived in a mansion with marble columns and damask wallpaper and worn designer clothes. She much preferred her one-room apartment and department-store wardrobe. 

The house had a heavy oak door with a huge brass knocker. Mai picked up the knocker and let it fall against the door. The sound echoed ominously. She looked over at Sokka, who was straightening his bow tie. Poor guy, she thought, they were going to eat him alive. He had no idea. 

Mai noticed a pretty girl watering the flowerbeds. She was wearing a pink gingham pinafore and a matching ribbon on the end of her long braid of hair. One of the servants, Mai figured. 

Azula came to the door, wearing a fur-trimmed negligee and bedroom slippers. If she wanted Mai to think she had just woken up, she had failed. Mai noticed that her hair was carefully styled and that she was wearing a full face of makeup. “Oh, thank goodness you’re here,” she said with a little too much emotion. “Who’s this? She asked disdainfully, jerking her head towards Sokka. “A friend,” said Mai coldly, “I brought him along for moral support.” She glanced at Sokka, who seemed to be trying to look tough. He was failing miserably, but he didn’t seem to realize it yet. 

Azula ushered them into a small sitting room, where her brother was standing nervously by the window. Mai stifled a gasp: she knew him! He had once been her date to an unbelievably boring party. She recognized him because of the burn scar on his left eye. Wasn’t that a coincidence! She wondered if he would recognize her. “Good morning,” said Zuko stiffly, “won’t you sit down?” Mai sank into an armchair and crossed her legs. She hated sitting “like a lady”, but she felt she didn’t have a choice. Sokka seemed dazed. He wasn’t used to surroundings like these. Mai kicked him in the shin. “Sit down, you idiot,” she hissed. Sokka, still not entirely there, sat down on a velvet couch and stared into space. Mai really did feel sorry for him. She would be at least as confused if she hadn’t grown up in a house like this. Well, she had tried to warn him. “Tell me about your father,” Mai began, addressing Azula. Azula took out a handkerchief. Not again with the grieving daughter act, Mai thought to herself. Did Azula really think that would work? “He… he was very wealthy, as you know,” Azula began, “our mother left when we were children, and he raised us alone. Well, he raised me, anyway. Zuko…”   
“Damn it, Azula, why mince words?” Zuko interrupted, “he was a terrible father. Why don’t you tell her how I got this scar?” Azula glared at her brother.  
“I was getting to it, Zuko. There’s no need to be impatient.” She turned to face Mai.  
“My brother never really got along with our father. They… they fought often. That’s how Zuko got the scar.” Sokka winced. Mai had heard this story before, of course, but how could Sokka have known?   
“And how old were you when that happened?” She knew perfectly well how old he had been: only thirteen. But she felt it was best to ask. It made people nervous if they thought you knew too much about them. “Thirteen. I went to live with my uncle after that.”  
“Why did you come back?”  
“My father decided he had forgiven me. I felt like I couldn’t say no.” Mai could understand that. A few years earlier, her mother had written to her, begging her to come back. She had almost fallen for it. She had even packed a bag and taken a taxi back to her old neighbourhood. But the sight of the ancestral home had changed her mind. She wasn’t the same person now as she was when she had lived there. She liked herself a hell of a lot better now, so how could she ever go back? Zuko must not have the same amount of determination, or maybe he just wasn’t as bitter.

Mai and Sokka were finally allowed to leave early that afternoon. On their way out, Mai nearly collided with the girl she had seen earlier. The girl was now carrying a watering can, the contents of which she spilled all over herself and Mai in the process. “I’m so sorry,” she exclaimed, “I should have looked where I was going.” Mai was about to respond with something along the lines of “yeah, you should,” but the girl looked sincerely sorry, so she said only, “that’s quite all right.”   
“No, really,” said the girl, “that was stupid of me. Here, let me help you dry off.” She ran towards the shed that stood in the far corner of the yard and came back with a towel. She was incredibly agile, Mai thought. The girl handed Mai the towel. “I’m Ty Lee, by the way,” she said, smiling. She had a great smile, sweet and earnest. “I’m Mai. And seriously, don’t worry about it. I’m only a little damp.”   
“Are you sure? I’m afraid I’ve ruined your blouse.”   
“No, really, it doesn’t matter. Don’t worry about it.”


	2. You Can Never Quite Recall

Mai left the property in a daze. She only snapped out of it when Sokka jabbed her with his elbow. “What was that for?” she protested  
“Payback for kicking me earlier. What are you thinking about?”  
“Huh? Oh… nothing much.”  
“Bullshit. The last time I saw that look on your face was after you met your last girlfriend – you know, that nightclub singer Katara introduced you to.”  
“I’m sure I don’t know what you’re talking about.”  
“Whatever you say.”  
“Cut it out!”  
“Cut what out? All I said was ‘whatever you say’. I’m agreeing with you.”  
“See, this is why I don’t like taking you along when I’m working.”  
“What, because it’s a regular occurrence for you to get starry-eyed over some girl who spills water on you?”  
“No, because – you know what I meant.”  
“Do I?”  
“Keep acting like this and I’ll have to fire you.”  
“You’ve been saying that three times a week for five years.”  
“That just proves you’ve been testing my patience constantly for years.”  
“No, it proves you’re all talk and no action.”  
“I’ll show you action.”  
“I’d like to see you try – wait, don’t stab me, I was kidding.” Mai had pulled a dagger out of her pocket. “Coward,” she said mockingly as she put it back.

As much as she resented Sokka being right, Mai had to admit that she couldn’t stop thinking about Ty Lee. She was unlike any girl Mai had ever known. She’s never had many close female friends. She had nothing in common with her classmates from private school, and most of the women she met in her line of work weren’t much better. Sure, she was kind of close to Sokka’s sister and his girlfriend, and she had been in plenty of relationships, but this random girl she had met by chance felt… different, somehow. Mai had always dismissed the idea of love at first sight – but then, it had been a long time since she had believed in capital-L Love at all. But maybe she had been wrong this whole time. Maybe there was someone out there for her to spend her life with, and maybe she had met that person on that unbearably hot and humid day, in the garden of a mansion in a part of town she had once sworn never to set foot in again. Maybe agreeing to help Azula wasn’t such a bad idea after all. 

Mai didn’t sleep much that night. She had too much on her mind. Under normal circumstances, Mai wasn’t exactly pleasant to be around when she was sleep-deprived. A charitable person might say she was irritable. Sokka said she was a total bitch. Either way, this time wasn’t like that. Even Sokka remarked, when she showed up at the office the next morning, that she seemed like she was in a good mood. Well, what he had actually said was, “Why are you so happy? Wait, have you finally stabbed that neighbour you hate? Do you need help hiding the body? I’ll call Suki, she knows all about that kind of thing” But that was basically the same thing, wasn’t it? “No,” she answered, laughing a little, “I’m just in a good mood, that’s all.” Sokka didn’t look convinced. “You’re never in a good mood.”  
“I have no idea what you mean. But it’s good to know that Suki knows how to hide a body. I’ll keep that in mind.” The conversation was interrupted by the phone ringing. It was Azula.

“What can I do for you?” Mai asked  
“Come over here. I need to speak to you. I suppose you can bring that friend of yours.”  
“Can’t you tell me whatever it is over the phone?”  
“Please. It’s urgent. I’ll send a car.” On any normal day, this would have gotten on Mai’s nerves. But today she was a little excited. Maybe Ty Lee would be there. “Come on,” she said to Sokka, “the queen has spoken.”

The car Azula had sent arrived around ten minutes later. It was a luxury model with leather seats. It reminded Mai of the car her parents had owned when she was a teenager. It had been ages since she’d been in any car that wasn’t a taxi, and, sitting in the back seat, she felt like she was seventeen again, on her way to some event she had no interest in attending. The driver was a middle-aged man with perfect posture who sat in stony silence and stared straight ahead of him. Mai looked down at herself and realized she had forgotten to change. Well, Azula would have to take her as she was. 

When the car pulled into Azula’s driveway, Mai found herself looking around eagerly, hoping to see Ty Lee. It was ridiculous. She had fallen for a girl she had seen once and barely spoken to. What was happening to her? This wasn’t the Mai she knew. That Mai would never act so stupid over a stranger. That Mai would stride confidently up to a pretty girl and charm her so effortlessly the girl wouldn’t even know what happened. This mai would probably get so nervous she would trip over her shoelaces and end up flat on her face.

Ty Lee was nowhere in sight, which was probably a good thing. The last thing Mai needed was a distraction. Azula answered the door when Mai knocked, and this time she really did look like she had just woken up. Her hair was messy and her mascara was smudged, like she had forgotten to take off last night’s makeup before going to bed. “You’re finally here,” she said, her voice slightly panicky, “I can’t find Zuko anywhere. We had an argument, and he stormed off, and I don’t know where he went.” 

Mai’s good mood had endured until this point, but now she finally got annoyed. “You called us here because of a fight with your brother? Do you see how ridiculous that is? You hired me because you wanted to clear your name, correct?” Azula nodded.  
“Then why do you think it’s also my job to get involved in your family problems? I’m a detective, not a counselor.” Azula’s lower lip quivered.  
“Good Lord, not this again! You think you can just bat your eyelashes and squeeze out a few tears and I’ll be putty in your hands. You’re nothing but a spoiled brat playing at being a femme fatale, and furthermore – Jesus Christ, Sokka, what do you want?”  
“I think I found Zuko.” Mai turned around to where Sokka was pointing. Sure enough, Azula’s brother was standing in the doorway, scowling. He strode up to Azula, shoving Sokka in the process. “What the fuck, Azula? What are they –” he gestured towards Mai and Sokka – “doing here?”  
“Your sister called us,” said Mai dryly. Zuko glared at Azula.  
“Well, you can leave now.” Mai turned to leave, taking Sokka by the arm, but Azula put her hand on Mai’s shoulder to restrain her. “Wait,” she said pleadingly. Mai and Sokka stopped.  
“What are you waiting for?” Shouted Zuko, growing angrier by the minute, “Get out of here!”   
“I want them to stay,” said Azula, her lip quivering again.  
“You should know by now that that won’t work on me,” snarled Zuko, angrier still, “Just because it worked on dad –” The change that passed over Azula’s face was almost frightening in its abruptness. An instant earlier she had looked forlorn and pitiful, a picture-perfect grief-stricken daughter. Now, she smoldered with a horrible, cold kind of anger. This wasn’t the kind of white-hot rage Mai herself sometimes felt, when she might lose control and do something she would regret later. Azula’s anger was ice-cold and calculating. If Azula hurt anyone — and she was perfectly capable of it, Mai didn’t doubt that for an instant — she wouldn’t regret it. Mai grabbed Sokka by the arm and pulled him away from Azula and out of the room. As soon as they were out of earshot of Azula, Sokka freed himself from Mai’s grip. “What the hell, Mai? She might hurt Zuko! Shouldn’t we stay and make sure nothing happens?”   
“I’m sure Zuko can defend himself.”  
“I don’t care how tough you think Zuko is. That Azula is scary. And I’m pretty sure she’s got a gun.” Mai rolled her eyes. “He’ll be fine. Look, if you want to go back in there, be my guest. I won’t stop you.” Sokka didn’t look convinced, but he didn’t have time to retort. Ty Lee had just come around the corner of the house. “Hi,” she said, smiling at Mai. How was it possible for one woman to have such a beautiful smile? Mai didn’t know, but she wasn’t complaining. She wished she could say something suave and classy, but all she could think of was “Hi! It’s nice to see you again.” (Jesus fucking Christ, why did she have to say that? Now Ty Lee would think she was desperate) “Oh! It’s nice to see you too!” Ty Lee replied with a laugh. Her laugh was great too. It was so sweet and genuine. “Well, we have to leave now. See you around.” 

Sokka looked unbearably smug, so Mai punched him. “Stop looking like that!”   
“Stop looking like what?” Mai punched him again. “You know what I mean. Stop looking like you’re about to say ‘I told you so’.”  
“Well, I did tell you so, didn’t I? You like her.”  
“Oh, shut up. And don’t act so innocent. I saw you checking out Azula’s brother.”  
“What? He’s cute!”  
“Yeah, he’s cute and you have a girlfriend.”  
“So just because I have a girlfriend, that means I’m blind? I would never do anything to hurt Suki. You know that.”  
“You’d better not. Suki could have had anyone she wanted. You should be grateful she chose you.”  
“Oh yeah? Who could she have had, exactly?”  
“Me, for starters.”  
“I don’t think you can call me a bad boyfriend for noticing a cute guy and then announce that you want to seduce my girlfriend.”  
“I didn’t say I was going to seduce her, I just said she could have dated me if she wanted to. And you have to admit, Suki and I would be the ultimate power couple.” Sokka mumbled something under his breath. Mai just laughed. 

The cab ride back downtown was mostly silent. “Look, I’m sorry I implied Suki was out of your league,” Mai finally said, “I didn’t really mean it. I hope you know that.” Sokka didn’t say anything, but his expression softened. “Look, I’m not great at this stuff. But I think you’re great, I really do. Sure, Suki could have had anyone. But she chose you. That’s gotta count for something.” Sokka smiled, then laughed softly. “I knew it! I knew you liked me!”  
“Of course I like you, idiot. I wouldn’t let you hang around so much if I didn’t. I’m just mean to the people I care about. You should know that, we’ve been friends for — how long is it? Eight, ten years?”  
“Nine. And I do know that, but you can’t do that forever. Why do you think none of your relationships last? Cynicism is fine, but you have to be sincere one of these days.” Mai’s eyes began to sting. “Look, do we have to have this conversation?” She snapped, swallowing the lump in her throat, “Who do you think you are, my shrink? I don’t need you to psychoanalyze me.” Sokka opened his mouth to say something, but he seemed to think better of it and said nothing. Instead, he put his hand on Mai’s shoulder and they sat in relatively comfortable silence until the taxi stopped in front of Sokka’s building. He got out of the car and Mai watched him walk into the building and stop to chat with the doorman. Mai sighed. Sokka would be going back to a cheerful home. Someone might be waiting for him. Suki, maybe, or his sister. Mai would be going back to a gloomy apartment where she would have to be alone with her thoughts. 

Mai unlocked the door of her apartment. She kicked off her shoes and tossed her hat and jacket to the floor. She went into the bedroom and flung herself onto the bed. As the teardrops started, she cursed Sokka. Why did he have to say that? He was right, of course. Mai knew that. Always had known it, on some level. She had trouble with sincerity and sentimentality. She knew she wasn’t exactly long-term girlfriend material. But Jesus Christ, did he have to put it into words? She didn’t like to think about this kind of thing. She hadn’t always been like this. But she had been forced to make her own way in the world, and that meant developing a thick skin. life hadn’t been easy for Mai since she had left home, but her setbacks had made her tough. If it had made her cynical, maybe that’s what she had to be. The powers that be — God, fate, the universe, whatever — had put obstacles in her path, and she had overcome them. She had only done what she had to do to get by, and maybe that had hardened her heart. There was no going back now.


	3. The Face in the Misty Light

Mai woke up to grey skies and dismal, drizzling rain. She sat up and rubbed her eyes. The clock on her bedside table said it was ten minutes to seven. Was that ten minutes to seven in the morning, or in the evening? She was still fully dressed, but her clothes were crumpled and creased. How long had she been asleep? 

She wandered into the living room and switched on the radio. Her neck felt stiff. She must have slept in an odd position. “And now for the evening news,” said the radio announcer. Well, that established what time it was. How long had she been asleep? She remembered getting home sometime around noon. She had been upset about something — What was it? Well, it must not have been very important, if she couldn’t even remember what it was. Well, it was seven PM and she hadn’t eaten anything since breakfast. She ought to have some dinner. Was there anything in the fridge? She started to walk towards the kitchen, but something the radio announcer said caught her attention. Had he just mentioned Azula’s father? She stopped walking and listened. “... the wealthy businessman was found dead in the dining room of his mansion by one of the household staff on the morning of July second, following a dinner party the night before. The cause of death was determined to be poison. His son and daughter, who lived with him, were questioned by police, but no charges were brought due to insufficient evidence. Earlier today, police announced that they would be suspending their investigation.” Mai knew what that meant. The cops knew — or thought they knew — who had done it, but they couldn’t prove it. Well, Azula wouldn’t need her services anymore. Mai would never have to go back to that foreboding mansion on the hill. 

Mai wasn’t sure why she felt disappointed. She should have been relieved. Azula had been nothing but trouble, and now the chances of ever having to deal with her again were slim to none. So why did she feel like she was losing something? “Snap out of it,” she told herself sternly, “This is about that girl from the garden again, isn’t it? Well, you’ll just have to forget about her. She deserves better than a fuckup like you, anyway. Look at you. Your apartment’s a mess and the only thing in the fridge is a grapefruit and half a bottle of wine. You make your living by snooping around in other people’s business. What do you have to offer?”

Mai barely slept that night. She would have liked to think it was because she had thrown off her sleep schedule by passing out for most of the afternoon, but she knew it wasn’t only that. Her thoughts were going a mile a minute, and most of them were about Ty Lee. Was this what being in love felt like? If it was, she didn’t want it. Why did the poets write odes to love and romance? It was hell. Given a choice, Mai would choose her one-night stands and short-lived flings with women whose faces and personalities all blended together in her memory after a while over whatever the hell this was any day. No contest. And yet… what if she wasn’t as hopeless as all that? Did she dare imagine a future where the woman she loved loved her back? Christ, “the woman she loved”. That sounded so corny. Why not just say “her lady love”, while she was at it? What was she becoming? This wasn’t the old Mai.

Mai rolled over and waited for sleep, but it didn’t come. Instead, a wave of despair washed over her, the kind of ice-cold hopelessness that only engulfed her when she was awake at three o’clock in the morning. The feeling she got sometimes when she thought about the future she was building for herself, barren and empty. Mai had always walked alone, in a sense. The scowl she perpetually wore was a carefully crafted mask, designed to make sure nobody got close enough to discover what was really behind it. But underneath it all, what did she really want? She could say she wanted to be alone all she wanted, the middle-of-the-night version of her knew that wasn’t really true. But she had worn the mask for years — all her life, really. Could she ever really take it off?

Mai showed up late to the office. Sokka was waiting outside, looking impatient and a little annoyed, but his expression immediately softened when he saw Mai’s forlorn expression and the bags under her eyes. “Rough night?” He asked, not unkindly. Mai shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about it.” To his credit, Sokka didn’t press the question. 

Mai unlocked the door and walked into the office. Sokka followed her. She sank into her chair and put her head in her hands. “This is some headache I’ve got. Would you go to the corner and get me a cup of coffee?” Sokka took the money she handed him and left the room without saying anything. Mai could tell he felt sorry for her. She hated being pitied, but this time even she had to admit she deserved it. 

When Sokka came back with the coffee, Mai thanked him and asked him if he had heard the evening news the night before. He hadn’t — he hadn’t been home — so she told him what she had heard. “What does that mean for us?” He asked when she was finished.  
“It means we’re done. All that’s left to do is collect our fee.”   
“Should I phone Azula?”  
“No need. I suspect she’ll phone us.”Sure enough, around a minute later, the phone rang and Mai answered. “Mai?” Said Azula’s voice on the other end of the line, “Have you heard the news?” Mai said she had, and Azula continued. “Isn’t it wonderful? I’m calling to ask how much I owe you.” Mai named her price and said she would be over later that day to pick up her check. 

Mai and Sokka took a taxi to Azula’s home early that afternoon. Now that her name was cleared, Azula was every bit the gracious hostess, welcoming them with open arms. She ushered them into the back garden, the bishop sleeves of her chiffon dress billowing. “Sit down,” she said pleasantly, “I’ll go get my check book.” Mai sat down and motioned for Sokka to do the same. As they were waiting for Azula to come back, Mai silent and a little sullen and Sokka still dazed due to the unfamiliar surroundings, Zuko wandered out of the house and into the garden. He still seemed a little standoffish, but he greeted them civilly enough and sat down next to Mai. “Nice day,” he remarked blandly. Mai nodded. “I have a question,” Sokka announced, addressing Zuko. Mai was too shocked to stop him. She was afraid he would get angry, but he just smiled. It was amazing what a change it made in his face. “Well, what is it?”   
“The day your sister called us here, she said you had argued about something. She said you had gotten angry and stormed off. What did you fight about?” A shadow passed over Zuko’s face. Mai wanted to strangle Sokka. Why did he have to ask that? They were doing so well until he did. “Just the usual sibling stuff. You know how it is.” Mai didn’t know how it was. Her only sibling was fifteen years younger than her, and had been just a little kid when she had left. But Sokka nodded. “Still,” he persisted, “you seemed really angry. So did she. That’s not ‘just the usual sibling stuff.’ That’s a serious fight.” Zuko’s expression darkened. Mai kicked Sokka in the shin under the table. “Can’t you shut up?” She hissed in his ear. Sokka did as he was told, but still looked thoughtful. “What are you going to do now that the investigation is over?” Mai asked in an effort to change the subject. “I’d like to find my uncle again. I haven’t seen him since I came back here. And I’d like to use the money I inherited to start a charity for kids like me.”  
“What do you mean?”  
“When dad found out I was gay, he threw me out. If it hadn’t been for uncle… well, I hate to think about what might have happened to me. I want there to be a place for the kids who don’t have an uncle like mine.” Mai felt a pang of empathy for Zuko. She hadn’t had much help after her parents kicked her out, but she had been relatively lucky. Many weren’t so fortunate. She had known a few of them — but she didn’t like to think about that.

Azula materialized in the doorway, still looking beautiful. She handed Mai a check and shook her hand, smiling warmly. “Thank you so much for all you’ve done,” she purred. Mai was a little confused. It was suspicious that Azula seemed so happy. Sure, she might be sincere, but Mai didn’t think sincerity was one of Azula’s defining personality traits. Mai suspected Azula was trying to get rid of her. “But… we didn’t do anything,” Sokka blurted out. Azula’s smile faltered, but she didn’t say anything.

On the way out, Mai heard someone calling her name from the garden shed. She looked around to make sure Azula wasn’t watching, then walked up to the shed. Sokka followed her, looking dubious. Mai felt her face break into a smile when she saw who had called her: it was Ty Lee. Ty Lee wasn’t smiling, though. She looked nervous. She grabbed Mai by the shoulder and pulled her into the shed. Sokka followed. Mai was a little annoyed by that, but she supposed it was best if she wasn’t alone with Ty Lee. 

“I know who did it,” Ty Lee said gravely. Mai’s eyes widened. She heard Sokka stifle a gasp. “But if I tell you,” she continued, “you have to promise you won’t go to the police.” Mai didn’t know what to say. Truth be told, she hadn’t really intended to go to the police in the first place. After hearing about how Zuko and Azula’s father had treated his own son, she figured maybe he deserved what he got. “Of course,” she said, “you can trust me.” Ty Lee smiled that beautiful smile of hers. “Azula killed him. And Zuko knew about it.” Mai wasn’t sure why she was surprised. She had always known there was something off about Azula. “But… how do you know?”   
“I was in the kitchen on the night it happened. Azula came in to ask the cook something, and as she was leaving I saw her slip something into her father’s wine glass. And later on… well, you remember the day Azula called you in a panic because Zuko was missing?” Mai and Sokka both nodded. “They had a fight about something — I don’t remember quite what, I missed the beginning — and Zuko threatened to turn her in. She pleaded with him, and she said she had only done it for him, but he was so angry by then… anyway he stormed off, and I guess Azula panicked and called the first person she could think of.” Mai nodded slowly. It all made sense. Of course, she would keep her word. If ever anyone got what they deserved, it was Azula’s father.

One sleepy afternoon a few months later, Mai was sitting in her office. The honey-coloured October sun was shining through the Venetian blinds, creating strips of golden light on the floor. Tiny specks of dust, illuminated by the sun, were dancing in the air near the window. Mai, leaning in her chair with her feet up on her desk, her hat tilted over one eye, was staring lazily into space. She was reasonably happy. She had just been paid for her last case. She hadn’t thought about Ty Lee in weeks. Maybe that night she would go out to dinner to celebrate closing the case. Maybe she would take Sokka and Suki with her, if she wanted company. Maybe she would even call Zuko, with whom she had become close in the intervening months. Even Azula was much more pleasant since she had found a good psychiatrist. Or maybe she would just go back home and spend the evening with the three-legged black cat she had recently taken in. That cat was like her: not perfect, not even close, but trying to be better.

Mai was jolted out of her reverie by a knock on the door. “Come in,” she shouted. When the door opened, she caught a brief glimpse of Sokka, grinning from ear to ear. But she didn’t look at him for long, because standing in the doorway, bathed in the glow of the setting sun, was Ty Lee. Against her will, Mai felt a smile tugging at the corners of her mouth. She tried to force her features into her signature scowl, or at least a half-decent smirk, but it was no use. She was grinning like an idiot. But she didn’t care as much as she would have a few months earlier. 

Ty Lee came into the room, closing the door behind her. Mai pointed to a chair, and she sat down. “Mai?” She said, a little nervously, Mai thought, “I want to tell you something, but you can’t interrupt me until I’m done, because I’ll lose track of where I am and I’ll stop making sense.” Mai promised she wouldn’t, and Ty Lee continued. “Ever since I first saw you — you remember, I spilled water on you — I… well, I haven’t stopped thinking about you. I think… Mai, I think I’m in love with you.” Mai was so happy she thought she might cry. “I — I think I’m in love with you too.” Ty Lee smiled, and Mai thought she had never looked more beautiful than she did right then, with the soft sunlight on her face and the sweetest, most tender expression Mai had ever seen in her eyes. But Mai didn’t have time to reflect on it any further, because Ty Lee leaned across the desk and…

Mai had been kissed before. Dozens, hundreds, even thousands of times. But it had never felt like this. Even her first kiss, at age seventeen in the dormitory at the private girls’ school she had attended, hadn’t been so thrilling. Ty Lee tasted like summer and strawberries and every good thing Mai still believed in. 

They left the office together, Ty Lee’s head on Mai’s shoulder and Mai’s arm around Ty Lee’s waist. Mai caught a glimpse of Sokka’s smug expression, but she didn’t care. Let him go home and tell Suki and Katara that she had finally fallen hard for someone. It had taken Mai long enough to get her life on track, and now she had found the person she wanted to spend it with.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, I hope you liked it!


End file.
